No ego in this chapter...

After a shocker day yesterday, a shot of morphine late last night(seriously good gear), and a raging temperature I enjoyed a relatively good sleep and woke to feeling ok, and no temperature. Sensational!

Anyway, after a good start to the day, my 11am education appointment learning about my "Chemo Pack" that went for nearly 2.5 hours left me with a reality check of what I am about to go through. No wonder alternative medicine is so popular!!

Any way, now I also know what the Cancer Council does, they are incredible.

I have come home with a show bag with no less than 28 brochures and books, 4 sample lotions and wipes and a "Spill Care Box". Oh dear, it was only a few years ago I nearly fainted having some blood taken, and now this. Anyone heard of a PICC Catheter? Google it. It is designed for infusion of fluids and medications into the blood but it goes into your veins about 450mm. Sylv and Gen were with me and Gen nearly fainted, Sylv went white and all I could think of was "holly shit".

Then there was the lesson on what to do if there was a spill, and a full scale spill kit with gloves, soaker pads, disposal bags and stuff. This gear must be like nuclear waste.

Also got the low down on staying away from any sick people, on side effects for which it isn't a brochure, it is a damn book! This was my most confronting education session in my 54 years.

OK, so now we have had the session on radio therapy, chemo, and late after noon today it was my return to my surgeon, and it was on again. Again my support team Sylv, Gen and I (Suz was ringing from Sydney all day, and appropriately rang in the middle of this consult) all headed in to get the detailed run down of the Surgery, and what was involved with the opperation. You have to be kidding, and I thought the Chemo lecture was insane. At least Gen didn't faint, well done Gen. I asked for a copy of the body map with all the marks on it...deep breath, and I thought I was a hero with my Diverticular operation, that was just a scratch on the tummy.

While I am on that, this blog is to help keep the truth getting in the way of the stories. This is absolutely my first Cancer, and this has NOTHING to do with that operation. So feel free to correct the story tellers, but there again, who really cares...it is what it is.

Anyway we called Suz back as soon as we left the Surgeon's Practice and she wants to come home to help out until we get through this next few months, so I am very excited about that. As I mentioned a few days ago, AMP Capital have been nothing short of amazing with the way they have assisted us as a family to come together and that Company sure is a great Australian Company, thank you.

So I have now got the low down on radio therapy, got the message on Chemo, and got into the detail on surgery...I recon I can feel sorry for myself for a few days! So poor me!

I also now know why people freak out so much about cancer, any way, as I mentioned in my earlier blogs, I am just a number in a long long list of every day Mums, Dads and Kids that go through this trauma. I am very thankful I have so much support, I am so thankful no one in my family have had to go through this, I have been very lucky.

People ask "how do I feel?".

Yeah, I feel like I just want this to all go away. I feel I am going to really hate all the medical jabs and pipes and stuff hanging out of me. I feel I should be catching up with more mates and saying G-Day. I feel I have let many of you down by not calling or responding to your messages, so I am so sorry BUT I am getting them and I do love the support. Please don't think I am not appreciating your generous and supportive messages, I just have been storing them away and I will hopefully get back to you when I can. I feel strong at the moment, but realize the fun is about to begin. I feel very comfortable with my belief systems, and I feel I will be a serious fighter if the going does get extra tough. I feel I will learn a lot, actually have already learnt a lot, and when I come out the other end, will be a hell of a lot better person for the experience.

No egos in this chapter of my life!

The silver lining? They (medicos) want me to eat a nutritional meal PLUS any amout of fatty cream cakes and chocolates and stuff to stack on some weight. How about that? Don't panic, we can do the carrot juice the asparagus concentrate and all the other herbal stuff, BUT fancy being told to go and have cream buns and chocolates. So Alister (Haigh), otherwise known as "Choc", yes definately catch up on the weekend, and yes to the chocolate fix! My taste buds will be blown up from next week so it maybe a big weekend of indulgence?

So over all, a day to remember. Tomorrow is a quieter day, calm before the storm, hey.

For all those who have been close to people with Cancer, or work with Cancer patients, I take my hat off to you all. You are very special people.